Diary Entry - Day 2: Why did the chicken cross the road?

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The chicken is a peculiar bird. It can't fly, swim or run very fast. It’s neither aggressive nor possesses a beak or talons sharp enough to defend itself. It just lays eggs and trudges along, waiting to be made into nuggets to be offered to guests at house parties and little children for their school lunches. And yet this enterprising little bird carries in its blood the long-forgotten genes of the mighty dinosaurs of eras past, and those silent filial bonds express themselves in one character-defining endeavor which has become the cornerstone of this species’ cultural identity: its desire to cross the road.




Which raises the question which has haunted philosophers, biologists, and Reddit shitposters alike: Why did the chicken cross the road?

What great primordial need yearend this humble little avian forward as it decided to make the strenuous journey across the river of asphalt, braving the constant barrage of high-speed automobiles and disgruntled pedestrians. What great prize lay on the other side which would incentivize an undertaking so fraught with risk and danger?

The sad reality is that we simply do not know. The brightest minds of our time have only been able to speculate on an answer but a common consensus has yet to be reached. No study has been conducted which could provide sufficient clarity to put this matter to bed once and for all. And so dear reader, I too shall try my luck at this game, put forth my own theory based on the very limited life experiences I have gathered, and impart my own unique brand of wisdom.


I present for your kind consideration my answer to the question: Why did the chicken cross the road?


To find a solution I first went to the root of the problem. Not the chicken as one would assume but the road. I first asked myself, why would a road need crossing anyways? The obvious answer would be to get to the other side and that would be correct. But that’s too simplistic and one must dive deeper. Why must the other side be reached? Why does the other side even exist? Why are there any sides to begin with? What even is a side?

As I dived deeper into the root cause of this conundrum, I stumbled upon a rather elegant explanation: The two sides of any road are but the mere consequence of its existence. Without a road, no sides would exist. And once this simple idea was completely grasped by my painfully limited mental faculties, I started to see the road for what it was: A dichotomous creation of human vanity. In our attempt to connect two places with a well-paved, pre-defined path we had instead created a barrier separating the natural landscape and giving birth to the ‘sides’, the painful manmade partition the humble chicken was trying to overcome in its epic journey.


And so I found the answer to my first question, a road needs to be crossed to unite what man has divided. To overcome the vanity of the human spirit one must cross the road.

Having thus understood the fundamental motivation for its actions I then asked myself why was it the chicken that took ownership of it. Why is it the chicken that crosses the road, not the duck, dog, cow, or cat? An easy answer to this unfortunately does not exist and one has to again dive deep in trying to understand the chicken. So that is exactly what I did.

The chicken or gallus domesticus is a domesticated species of jungle fowl that has evolved in tandem with mankind for over 4000 years. As such the bird has stood witness to the rise of civilisation and the corruption and greed of man. And perhaps like all other domesticated species, it feels a pang of guilt, a sense of responsibility in the great divide the road has brought. Perhaps the chicken feels that it was the flesh that fueled the building of roads and the creation of sides that needed crossing. All those nuggets and omelets its body had given flamed the fire which burnt down the natural order. And so with its soul scarred by this irredeemable sin, it decided to embark on this journey, nay this pilgrimage to untie that which so cruelly was divided.

But why the chicken you ask? Should not all domesticated animals share this common burden and responsibility? Should they all not partake in this ritual of remittance and healing?

Yes, they most certainly should. But guilt alone is not a sufficient motivator. All domesticated livestock share that common guilt. The chicken suffers an additional tarnish on its name: it's a branded coward. Its name is synonymous with the weak-willed and yellow-bellied. This was one accusation too far for the proud descendant of the mighty tyrannosaurus rex.

And so a chicken crosses the road, to redeem itself of the moniker of a coward, so unfairly adorned on it. To redeem itself of the guilt of human companionship, of the divide, it has brought forth upon this world. The chicken crosses the road to send a message, a message of courage, hope, and unity. 

It is a journey no less significant than Hannibal’s march across the Alps with 500 war elephants in tow, the charge of brave young men on the beaches of Normandy as they freed the world from evil and tyranny, and the great Mahatma’s steps with a thousand followers to reclaim the salt of their land.


The chicken in its journey encompasses the best and worst of humanity. As it crosses the road it talks of unity and divide, arrogance and humility, courage and cowardice. It talks of being human. The chicken crosses the road to remind us all that in some unique way we are all chickens, laying eggs and being slaughtered for nuggets and we are also the mouths it feeds.

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